Why therapy?
People bring a variety of issues into the consulting room, such as depression, anxiety, grief, work/career stress, profound discontentment (existential angst), and relationship difficulties. I work with them to gain a clearer understanding of what lies beneath their current challenges and how they can create strategies to reduce self-defeating thoughts and behaviors in order to live a more fulfilling and self-expressed life.
What do you do?
I work with clients first to help them become aware of their feelings in a more conscious way, a way that tries to understand them and learn from them instead of burying or cutting off from them. I believe feelings can be important sign posts, like guides. So my first encouragement is, Listen to to your feelings! They’re trying to tell you something! Understanding that growth requires risk, I support those I work with to view life as both experimental and experiential. This idea is reflected in Albert Einstein’s philosophy that, “Life is not a problem to be solved; it is a mystery to be lived.”
How does this work?
When we’re speaking to someone who is truly listening to us in a non-judgmental way we end up saying things we didn’t know we were going to say. This is therapeutic. When we talk to someone whom we feel truly hears us and “gets” us, who accepts us as we are . . . we begin to feel freer to reveal to that person (and, by proxy, to ourselves) more of who we really are. This is therapeutic.
The healing that occurs in this safe space of speaking and being heard and seen is rarely duplicated in the world outside the consulting room. If you’re fortunate enough to have someone who gives you this kind of attention, then you know how precious that is. I create a safe space for revealing and discovering who you are, how you’re being in the world, and, if necessary, why? I help you find in yourself your preferred mode of being, to create more effective ways of getting what you want out of your life, and I work with you to execute a plan to make that happen.
How long does it take?
There is no “one size fits all.” We’ll figure it out together. I help you help yourself. I can create a safe space for that to unfold at it’s own tempo. I can also be slightly pushy. I sometimes supply needed urgency to move things along. My main job is to put myself out of a job. Sometimes this doesn’t take long. More often it takes awhile.
Can I speed things up?
I’ve seen clients dig in and work to speed up the process, and I’ve had clients treat visits to my office like going to the dentist. There is the old truism, “Whatever you resist, persists.” So, yes, you can speed things up, but you sort of have to lean into them.
Is couples counseling cheaper than a divorce?
Yes. Divorce is a big business in the United States. It is in fact a $28 billion-a-year industry with an average cost of about $20,000. For the average cost of a divorce in the United States you can have 114 couples counseling sessions with me. I feel confident in predicting that no matter what your issues are as a couple, we won’t need 114 sessions to sort them out.
Do you accept insurance?
No, I don’t directly accept insurance as payment but I can provide a monthly super-bill that can be submitted to your insurance company for reimbursement of what you have already paid. Typically a PPO will do this. Check with your insurance provider to see if they reimburse for psychotherapy with an Out-Of-Network provider.
Keep in Touch